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Re-humanization

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Re-humanization
The end to a particular journey. Comments (criticisms especially) welcome.

Posts and Comments
Important Post
gatekeeper3073

A good story! It held my attention easily and conveyed emotion nicely. As for the technical aspects, spit and polish comes with time. You've the beginings og a great writing career! Good Luck!

Important Post
joeparente

Benjamin - I liked your story of truth because it felt that you have been there.

Important Post
susanbowes (aka: Forcechild)

I find your story had a good beginning, but I soon found myself as lost as this traveler sounded. It would have been a very good tale if a point was made and/or some conclusion. It was a very good attempt though. Keep at it. You appear to be very talented.

Important Post
melodyrgreen

Your use of language is an interesting juxtaposition of where the character is placed at the beginning of your story.

The journeyer is a complex character walled into himself, afraid to show vulnerability, compelling but not necessarily likeable!

Your characterisation shows maturity and depth unusual in such a young writer.

Good luck in the competition.

Important Post
mrmarion

I am sorry but after reading the first 6 pages of your book, I was dissappointed with the sentence structure, the wirdiness, mis-use of words (to for too) and other grammar mistakes, I gave up. I do not mean to be hateful, rather to be truthful and it is not my intent to hurt you in any manner.

1 Comment
littlegustv

degustibus non disputandum est

i thank you for pointing out that typo, though since you were not specific with your other complaints I'm not really sure what to look for (I re-read the story looking for word misuse and grammar mistakes, but didn't see any). Other than that, I'm... Show more

Important Post
littlegustv

thank you for pointing that out - though I believe "soporific" is used correctly, if awkwardly. in my haste to finish this, I didn't really look it over at all, so I appreciate you catching that

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