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The Crater

User: disha
The Crater

There Is Nothing In Which American Liberty, Not Always As Much
Restrained As It Might Be, Has Manifested A More Decided Tendency To Run
Riot, Than In The Use Of Names. As For Christian Names, The Heathen
Mythology, The Bible, Ancient History, And All The Classics, Have Long
Since Been Exhausted, And The Organ Of Invention Has Been At Work With
An Exuberance Of Imagination That Is Really Wonderful For Such A
Matter-Of-Fact People. Whence All The Strange Sounds Have Been Derived
Which Have Thus Been Pressed Into The Service Of This Human
Nomenclature, It Would Puzzle The Most Ingenious Philologist To Say. The
Days Of The Kates, And Dollys, And Pattys, And Bettys, Have Passed Away,
And In Their Stead We Hear Of Lowinys, And Orchistrys, Philenys,
Alminys, Cytherys, Sarahlettys, Amindys, Marindys, &C. &C. &C. All These
Last Appellations Terminate Properly With An A, But This Unfortunate
Vowel, When A Final Letter, Being Popularly Pronounced Like Y, We Have
Adapted Our Spelling To The Sound, Which Produces A Complete Bathos To
All These Flights In Taste.

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