That's how it really was. The first time I laid my eyes on Drew I instantly fell in love with him. It's been three years since I first saw him, but he never really noticed me. Today was the day that I, Garrett, would make him notice me.
I walked up to him with a smile on my face. I had no idea why I was doing this; I was the shy one here. Drew was standing in the corner talking to one of his friends. I waited till the friend left to go up to him. When I got to him he looked down at me. He was at least a foot taller than me.
Drew was in the same grade as me, 11th. He had short black hair that covered his eyes most of the time. I couldn't complain though, for if you didn't know us you'd think we were twins. He was your average emo and so was I.
"Hey Garrett," he said. I was startled. This might sound a little stupid, but I was surprised that he knew my name.
"Hey," I replied, "I was wondering if you would like to come over tonight. I'm throwing a party and a couple of guys are coming over."
"I'd love to come over. When is it?" he asked.
"Starts at seven," I said. I gave him so other information about the party, like who’s coming and my address.
"Great I'll see you then," he smiled at me and I smiled at him in return.
Drew started to walk down the hallway as the bell rang. I was too excited to notice. I just stood there and watched him walk down the hallway. Then something hit me, I had to get to class! I ran through the hallways until I reached English class. As soon as I stepped foot into the classroom the bell rang. The teacher, Mr. Rallen, gave me a mean look. I quietly took my seat and pulled out my stuff.
Seven soon rolled around and there was a knock on the door. I answered it. It was a couple of the guys I asked to come and Drew. He had a big smile on his face when he saw me and I waved to him. After everyone had arrived, which was like, one other person. I got out the snacks and other stuff. I put on music to listen to but I was so concentrated on the fact that Drew was here.
"So what now?" someone asked, I think it was my friend Conner.
I turned in the general direction that the sound came from. "I don't know. Anyone got any ideas?" I asked.
Almost every one shook their head no except for Drew who made one of the most interesting suggestions. "How about truth or dare? I know it will be weird but that will make it more fun."
We all agreed to play and I showed everyone to the living room and we sat on the floor.
"Who's first?" I asked.
"How about you since you asked." Drew replied with a smirk on his face.
"Ok, ask away." said I.
My other friend, Jack, decided to ask the questions. "Truth or dare?" he asked me.
"Um, dare," I didn't exactly know what was going to happen but I was feeling a little adventurous today.
We sat there in silence for a few moments while Jack thought up a dare. Finally he spoke. "I dare you to go in the closet with Drew for five minutes. Alone."
By now my insides were screaming, and not in a good way. I started panicking but only in the inside. I didn't want everyone to think I was afraid to do it, so I agreed to do it. Oh god, what have I gotten myself into this time?
Jake and Conner literally shoved Drew and I into the closet and locked it behind us.
"So, Garrett, what now?" he asked me.
I didn't exactly know what was running through my head at the time because all of a sudden I blurted out, "I like you!" Oh shit, why the hell did I say that? What the hell was I thinking? Drew looked at me with a blank stare in silence. "I'm sorry, I shouldn’t have blurted that ou-" Before I could say anymore, Drew had me in his grip and his lips were glued to mine.
When he broke the kiss he looked down at me and smiled. "I guess that makes us even." He gave a small laugh.
"Wait, what?" I didn't understand this. Did he just admit to liking me? Oh my god he did!
"It's ok, I've liked you since the first day I saw you." he said. It was like he was me, for it was the same way with me. I still remember that day; I mean the day that we first met.
It was a nice summer day, the first day of school to be exact. I was sitting in homeroom and there he was, alone, sitting in the back next to me. He must have been a new student, for I’ve never seen him before. I've gone to the same school since elementary so I've pretty much known everyone that's been through here. He looked over at me with his blue eyes, which were a shade lighter than mine. His eyes sort of reminded me of the ocean they were so blue. He didn't say anything; instead he quickly turned his head and looked back down at his desk. I studied him for a moment. His short black hair covered his face. His black and white t shirt seemed to fight him like a loose glove. He was wearing black skinny jeans and a pair of black converse. I hate to admit it but he was… cute. He looked back up at me, now was my chance.
"I'm Garrett, what's your name?" I said quietly.
He didn't say anything at first; instead he just sat there in silence. Then he finally spoke. "Drew."
"Are you new here?" I asked. He nodded his head. "Well welcome to hell!" I laughed, he just smile.
We didn't really talk much after that.
"So now that we covered that, what now?" I asked him. We had a couple more minutes at least to spend in the closet. I found it quite hysterical that we came out of the closet in the closet. Oh the irony.
He didn’t say anything, he just shrugged his shoulders. I sat on the floor with my back against the wall and Drew sat next to me. "I guess we just wait. They did lock us in here." he said.
I looked over at him, but didn't say anything. I'd be lying if I said this was one of the worst days of my life, that I didn’t like him, and that I wish this time together would end. The truth was I did like him and I didn't want this time to end together. I wondered for a moment if we should tell the others, they will be asking what we did. I don't know if we will lie or tell the truth.
"So what are we going to tell them?" I asked Drew.
"I have no idea," he replied putting emphasis on the word 'no'.
I laughed a little and my hand found his. He held my hand tightly and I smiled. It felt good to be close to him.
"Any ideas what we are going to do for the next couple minutes?"
He didn't answer me. At first I didn't think he heard me, but he must of. One second I was about to say something and the next we were kissing. Without stopping, Drew pulled me onto his lap so that I was facing him. His lips were warm and soft. They tasted a bit like the soda he was drinking earlier.
Suddenly I heard the lock on the door turn. I climbed off of Drew's lap and sat next to him, just in time too. The door flew open almost hitting me, but Drew caught it before it did. He stood up and extended his arm towards me. "Coming?" he asked. I nodded and grabbed a hold of his hand. He helped me up.
Explaining to Conner and Jack about what happened in the closet was one of the most difficult things ever! Drew and I decided to lie about what happened but when we went to tell, and remember we had no planning before this, it was a disaster. Drew told one story and I told another. Eventually are stories mashed together and eventually made a little sense, but it only took us for what felt like forever to get it right.
"Bye!" I yelled out the door as Conner and Jack left. Drew decided to stay with me and help me clean up. Yeah I kind of doubt we're going to get much done. I shut the door behind them and turned to Drew. He wrapped his arms around me face and pulled me closer to him. He caught me off guard and if he hadn’t been holding me I might have fallen. I wrapped my arms around his neck and looked into his blue eyes. We stood like that for a moment and then he leaned down to kiss me. It only lasted a moment but I didn't care. I took a hold of his hand and pulled him towards the living room.
"First we have to clean up," I laughed. He stuck his tongue out at me and smiled back.
I picked up a couple of things that were scattered across the floor. My parents didn’t like a messy house and I wasn’t going to have one when they got back. They decided to go on a trip together for their anniversary. They went to Florida. I think it is nice that they went on a trip but they left me at home, by myself.
“All done,” Drew said walking back into the living room. “Now where were we?” He grabbed a hold of my arm and pulled me close to him. He laid down on the couch pulling me on top of him. "I love you," he whispered.
I looked down at him. "I love you too," I said back. I leaned down and kissed him. "I have for a very long time," I added. He smiled and I returned it with one of my own. I climbed off of the couch and he sat up. I took a seat next to him and leaned my head upon his shoulder. "So, Drew, what now? We have to rest of the evening to ourselves."
He took a minute to think about it and then shrugged his shoulders. "Food?" he asked.
"Ok," I answered. I took a hold of his hand and lead him into the kitchen. Looking through the cabinets and fridge I came to the conclusion that we really didn't have much to eat. "I don't know what we can eat, we don’t have very much. What do you want to eat?"
Suddenly Drew pulled me closer to him. He bended down so that he was only inches from my face. Then he made the weirdest remark, "How about you?" he whispered, laughing a little as he did. I just rolled my eyes and gave him a quick kiss.
"Seriously what do you want?" I laughed.
"You," he said laughing again as I pulled away from him.
"But you already have me. Ok, I'm serious now. What do you want, that is food, do you want to eat?" I turned around to face the kitchen.
Drew walked up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. "I don't know. What do you have?"
I shrugged my shoulders and said, "Look around and find what you want."
Drew stepped away from me and looked through the cabinets. We ended up eating chips, for that’s all we had.
Taking the chips with us we walked back into the living room and plopped down upon the couch. I picked up the TV remote and turned it on. After flipping through a couple of channels I found something to watch but I ended up not really watching it. It wasn't even that interesting, but Drew seemed to enjoy it.
I feel asleep soon. I hadn't even realized how tired I was.
I woke up and looked over at the alarm clock. It read 7:45. But the interesting thing about this was that it was in the afternoon I realized I was in my bed, but I couldn't quite remember how I got there. I rolled over to my other side and found Drew sleeping there. He must have put me in my bed after I fell asleep. I nudged him with my elbow, attempting to wake him from his sleep. He didn't budge so I did it again. This time he almost literally jumped.
"Hey get up!" I exclaimed. Drew slowly opened his eyes slightly and a smile spread across his face. "Come on!" He didn't say anything but he did pull back the covers. He was only in his boxers, which were, shockingly, bright pink. "Nice boxers," I said when he finally got out of the bed.
"Why thank you sir," said Drew. He gave a small chuckle and proceeded to pull on some of his clothes that had been thrown on the floor. I got out of bed and walked over to him. Placing my hands on his pale, bare chest, I looked up at him.
"I love you. You know that, right?" I said to him.
He looked down at me with compassion in his eyes. "I love you too," he replied. Drew leaned down to kiss me, but this one was not like the others. This one was with more compassion, with more force, with more love in it. He dropped what he was holding and placed his hands on my hips. He lowered them till they were at the bottom of my shirt and he slowly lifted my shirt and removed it from my body. He moved his kisses from my mouth to my neck. To tell you the truth, I never really felt this way about a guy before. I never really felt this way about anyone before. I loved him, and I always would. He moved his lips back up to mine and moved his hands lower this time. HE started to unbutton my jeans and helped me pull them off. If I didn’t have my underwear on, I would be completely naked.
Soon enough we were both in just our boxers, lying on the bed, kissing to the point where if you saw us you would probably think our lips would fall off soon enough. Drew continued to move his hands lower and lower. I stopped kissing him and moved away. I really wanted him, I really did, but I felt like it just wasn't the right moment.
"I'm sorry I can't do this. I don’t feel like this is the right moment. I'm sorry. I hope you can forgive me," I explained to Drew as I walked out of my room into the living room. I held my arms against my chest and felt like an idiot for saying that. I'm such a retard. What the fuck was I thinking? I wanted him, I wanted to be closer to him, but if I didn't want to I didn't have to and I hoped he would accept my opinion.
I sat down on the couch and crawled up into a ball. I placed my knees against my chest and wrapped my arms around them. I laid my forehead on my knees and slat there in silence. The sound of footsteps came from the hallway, getting closer with time. Obviously they were Drew's, but at the moment I kind of wished they were someone else's. What was I thinking? I loved Drew. What the fuck!
I didn't move an inch. Drew walked over to wear I was sitting and wrapped his arms around me. "It's ok. I understand. I'm not going to pressure you into anything you don’t want to do. I love you too much for that," he said trying to comfort me.
I have to admit it did help a little, the effort to comfort me I mean. I calmed down a little and looked up at him. My heart was telling me to try it again, but my brain was telling me otherwise. I didn't quite know which one to go with though. I was always told to go with what my heart tells me, but at this moment I didn't quite know what to go with. I pondered the thought for a moment and quickly made my decision.
I didn't have to say anything, it was like either Drew just knew or he read my mind, for he knew my decision. I leaned towards him and kissed him again. I relaxed my body a bit. Drew placed one hand upon my chest and with the other pushed me down onto the couch. I wrapped my arms around his neck.
I woke up next to Drew. My back was facing him and his arm was wrapped around me, holding me tightly against him. I looked around the room. Blankets and sheets were scattered everywhere, along with a few other items. The room looked like a tornado had recently swept through my room. I turned onto my other side and found Drew smiling at me. It wasn't really as creepy as you would think though. It was a cute smile, not a creepy one like some stalker would give you, or some creeper would. I smiled back at him.
"Morning love," he said to me. As soon as he said that it brightened up my morning. There is nothing quite like waking up in the morning to the one you truly love. A bigger smile, which I didn't even think was possible, spread across my face.
"Morning," I replied. Every moment popped up in my head from last night. It was wonderful and I would be lying if I said otherwise. The touch of his skin on mine. The feel of his lips on my body. Everything.
I nuzzled my head into his chest and Drew kissed my forehead. "You know Garrett, I have never felt like this about anyone. I love you, with all my heart, and always will no matter what happens," he whispered.
I whispered the words, "I love you too," back. I didn't know if I could say those words enough. I loved him with everything I had and if anything would happen to him, I couldn't live with myself. The same would probably be for him if something would happen to me.
I almost literally crawled out of bed.
I hit the floor and both Drew and I burst out laughing. I sat up and Drew came walking over to me.
"Are you ok?" Drew asked, but he struggled to say it, for he was laughing so hard. I nodded and stood up. We laughed for a moment together and walked towards the kitchen. If you saw us the scene would probably be a bit awkward. Drew standing behind me looking over my shoulder, almost completely naked except for the same bright pink boxers he was just the day before. And me, standing at the stove, making bacon, wearing only my black and rainbow striped boxers. The black and rainbow striped boxers are a long story. To shorten it down, they were a gag gift from a friend.
"Mmmmm, smells good," said Drew, "Bacon!" Suddenly the Bacon Strips commercial ran through my head. 'Bacon, got to get some bacon. Bacon, bacon, bacon!' I giggled a little. "What?" Drew asked.
I shook my head, "Nothing." I pushed the bacon around in the pan and placed the strips on a plate. Walking over to the table I placed them down and walked back over to the cabinets to pull out a couple of bowls and a box of cereal. "There we go!" I said as I placed the items onto the table and took a seat. Fuck! Of course I had to take the seat that was broken and every time you shifted it wobbled, and then you feel like you’re going to fall. Just my luck! I wasn't going to changes seats though, and look like an idiot.
As we ate, we planned out our day, for tomorrow would be the day my parents would come home. We agreed to just stay home, watch some movies, and probably end up ordering Chinese or something of that sort. That is exactly what we did.
After breakfast, I decided that we should take a walk. I needed the fresh air. I put on a pair on black skinny jeans and a black, Falling In Reverse, which is one of my favorite bands, t-shirt on. Drew threw on his old clothing. I would have gladly offered him some of my clothes, but they probably wouldn’t have fit him. I told him that we would stop by his house then to pick up some clean clothes.
It was a warm, sunny day. I ran my hands through my hair and brushed my bangs back in front of my eyes. I kind of envy Drew because of the. No matter what he does his hair always seems to fall perfectly. I wish I had hair like that.
I took a hold of his hand as we walked. I kind of came to the conclusion of, fuck whatever everyone else thinks!, idea. I laughed in the inside at the thought of this. We continued walking towards Drew's house.
Drew's house was a small, one story, average town house. It wasn't anything real special to say at the least. The darker brown exterior matched well with the black shutters and door. The lawn looked well taken care of. If I recall, Drew once told me something about how his mother loved to garden. Even if you were not told such things, you still could guess it just by looking at the house. A small tree was planted out front and flowers lined the house. A smooth, gray, stone pathway guided us to the front door. T stepped aside as Drew walked us to the door and knocked a couple of times. We waited a moment and the door opened. There, in the doorway, stood a short young woman which I would guess would be in her early to mid thirties. Her bleach blonde hair only fell to her shoulders. I guessed that it was dyed blonde for you could clearly see the brown roots of her hair. The woman wore a blue blouse and black suit pants. It was as though she was going to work.
I took this as Drew's mother.
Just then another girl, this one younger, stepped from behind into view. This must if been Drew's sister. Her black hair fell to her hips and was streaked with pink. Her clothes were as colorful as a rainbow you could say. She wore a neon green and white striped shirt. To my opinion, her shirt showed way too much. Her bright turquoise pants stood out too. I'll tell you, if she ever got lost in a crowd, it would be easy to find her. The girl also wore heavy makeup. At the looks of her she would be considered your average scene girl.
"Mom," Drew said looking over to her and then over to his sister, Sarah, "Sis, this is Garrett, a good -" he hesitated for a moment, "friend of mine." I was taken by surprise. I was his boyfriend for crying out loud! He must have had his reasons though.
His mother turned to me and stuck out her hand for me to shake it. "Nice to meet you Garrett," she said as I shook her hand.
"Nice to meet you too, Mrs. Hillden." I replied trying to be as polite as possible.
"Please call me Susan," she insisted. Then our attention turned to Sarah.
Without looking up, Sarah gave a small wave and said, "Hey." I waved back, though it was a worthless one, for she would have never seen it, and replied with a "hey" of my own.
There was a brief silence and then Drew said," I'll just be a few minutes, I just need clean clothes." She nodded and stepped aside, letting Drew through the doorway.
"So," she said turning to me, "How long have you and Drew been friends?"
"Since eighth grade," I said shyly. She was smiling but I wasn't. I was never really good around new people.
"That’s great!" she exclaimed. "Why haven’t I heard much about you though? Usually Drew tells me about all his friends," she said with a pulled look on her face. I noticed that Sarah had disappeared.
"We haven’t really talked in awhile," I admitted. Thank God, Drew came out and saved me. He was wearing a blue, plain, t-shirt and a pair of black skinny jeans. A small smile found its way on my face and soon we were off walking again. We had to walk at least two blocks till it was safe and we were free from his mother and sister.
"So apparently I'm not your boyfriend anymore. Apparently I'm just your friend," I laughed, joking around with him.
He threw his hands into the air and shrugged. "Sorry! My mom doesn’t know about us yet."
"Your mom doesn’t know about us or she doesn’t know you’re gay?"
"Ok she doesn’t know I'm gay. That's not something you blurt out to your mom. I don't even know how to start!"
"Tell her the truth. Say something like, 'Mom I need to talk to you. I'm gay. This is who I am and I hope you accept it.' say something like that."
"What did you tell your parents?"
I looked at him and stopped walking. I took a hold of both his hands and looked him straight into the eyes. "What I just told you to say."
He nodded and we continued to walk, hand in hand. "And it worked?" he asked me.
I nodded. I know him and I know that he would probably never do it, but you never know.
Publication Date: 05-21-2012
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