Part 0:Obligated Cloudless Child

In my palm lay a dieing bird
It's broken heart pumping blood to my dripping finger tips
Moving not a wing, chirping not a word
A shining eye looks to me in fear
And I shed but a single tear

A shiver rips through its fearthers red
The bitter truth:Worse alive than dead
Its shining eye begs and pleads
With unspoken words I read
And submit, to the filthy deed

I place its neck between my fingers
Knowing full well this moment will always linger
Through my life, good or bad
Smile, or be sad
I gain the courage I've always lacked
And with a twist of fingers, it begins with a sickening crack

Part 0.5:Cloudless Childs Begin Of Endance, Of Sound(Kind)

Twelve years to date, since that summer day
When I found that dieing bird, and took it's life away
And since then, it had progressed like a rolling ball of snow
"What happened to the cat, or the dog?" I lied, said I didn't know
But I did, full well I did, what happened to that dog and cat
One day I took them both to the forest, and only I came back
With blood on my hands, and a crack in my heart
Wishing it was father, who I riped apart
The stains he spills with his cold eyes
I cover with blood of others, and my own lies
"This bloodly face in the mirror I always see
To no fault of mine, this isn't me
My hands don't kill, no life is spilled
But I can't stop, it's far too soon
So untill then, I'll be on the dark side of the moon"

No friends hand to hold
No ear to hear, my stories told
Just a mirror
Just my fear
With eyes to empty souls
Just lies made of coal
Dark as death
Quick to burn
My crystal meth
My lesson learned

One day I fell, and cut my arm
The pain and blood, caused no alarm
I licked my wounds, the metal taste
Knowing of the mirror, I'll later face
It quickens my feeble heart
And spreads the crack, that later starts
To works it's way to my mind
Sooner or later, it'll find
A mind insane, ready to break
On that day, a life a stake

An artist failed, a painless trail
Who never should have bothered
The artistic failure, birthed half of father.

Part 1:Dissapointing Cloudless Child

How long will you wait to become
My dearest and truest number one?
How many will be killed,
How much blood with be spilled,
To cover the stains of my disaproval?

Will you cry all alone, the nights I'm not there?
Will you hope for that day, when I actually care?
Will life waste away, on the fleeting hope?
Will you use knives and pills, to try and cope?
Well I do hope you don't
Stupid fool
Be smart, free the tool
Which is your heart in my hand
Burn away the silk that blinds
See light, and understand
That you'll never be my pride
So long, as your alive
So be gone, be dead!
Get your filthy image
Out, from my head!

There are some scars on your arms
From where my words have harmed
In the form of a knive
Wielded, to kill off that life
Tainted by my lack of love
But just as a presumed
You failed to rise above
The fear of death
The last of breathe
And you still remain
All the same
My filthly little dissapointment

Once, you tried to say what you couldn't before
But those words cut short, as my hand struck you to the floor
For those words, were bitter and cold
Quick to offend, how dare you be so bold!
As you wiped the blood from your lip
A word of regret, slipped from your tongue tip
And you cried like the child you are
Then ran, ran away so very far
While I smiled at the drops of blood
You left in your wake
Knowing your tears, will soon be floods
And slowly, your life it will take

Now you've gone mad, crazy and true
I've never been so, disapointed in you
For giving in so fast
To your guilt stricken past
And drowning in your overflowing tears
And listening to the words, of your irration fears
That now take you away, to some far away place
Where you do as you please, for no one has a face
But what does it help, to kill these faceless people you see
That is unless, of all these faceless people, you're looking for me.

Part 2:The Cloudless Childs Deeds

Have you ever had the warm thrill
Of life, fading at your hands
If you haven't, come join my murderous band
And you'll see what I mean
Come see what I've seen
Come feel what I felt
The tightening of the belt
The blood shot eyes
The mouthing of lies
The beauty, in death

It's all for father, and his cold words
That day he struck me, and let free his bird
And how I've flown, into insanities palm
It's cool, warm, uncomfortably calm
Where you can't save face, for there's not one
But my own in the mirror, still blinded by the sun
That brightens my day, so I can see everybody
My knife is clean, it must now be bloody

Will you join, in my murderous band?
Or do you not, quite understand?
Then let me explain, I'm looking for my father
To cut open his throat, for he never should have bothered
To give life to me, his only baby
If he was just going to throw me away

Everyday I tried, in one way or two
To impress dear father with the things I could do
But they were never enough, he'd stare me down then walk away
And I'll never forgive him, not untill the day
Where he spills his blood, for all of my hurt
Begging apologies, for all the scars benieth my shirt
Where I cut myself, to bleed his blood
And cried myself a river, to drown in a flood

Come, take hand with me
Us two, can be "We"
Like I should have been with him
But that candle light, has since grown dim
So be by my side, as we strike down the faceless
By no measure of time, our walk will be paceless

Will you not join, my murderous band?
Will you keep it, just a lonely man?
Is that your answer, are you really sure?
Then so be it, my kindest sir...

With the flick of the wrist, a swift arm
He could not run, no chance of alarm
He fell quick with a sickening sound
Now he is buried, six feet benieth the ground
For death is the price of denial
He can rot for a little while
Let nature wither him away
Untill he is found, someday
Such a fool, to not join this band
What fun could have been had
I suppose he didn't understand
Probably took no good but the bad
But that's ok, I can go alone
One day, I'll find my way home
Where father sits in his chair
Rocking away, still without care
But I'll change that, I'll change that fast
I'll make him remember, and regret the past
All those winter stares that made me feel sick
All those feelings I felt, I'll make them stick
Right before I open his throat and kill him, kill him dead
Teach him the pain and suffereing, that he scarred into my head

pt>Part 3:Cloudless Child Of Surrogate Band

You don't need a face to die
But you do need eyes to cry
I have two but it feels like four
For the tears I've cried now on the floor
Have risen above my head
Drowning me, alive and dead
I'm outside my home
Not alone
With blood on my hands
On two feet I stand
With two feet I walk
To myself I talk
And hope no one hears

"Dearest dissapointment, go away
Beyond this note bound door, dismay
What you came to do, has been done
Latest of the night, without the sun
I jumped and fell, but I was caught
By this rope tied to the ceiling I bought
How you've tried and how you've cried
For the day which will now, never come
For death has caught me, but unlike some
It was not taken, but given to save face
Because I have one, with it I've won this race
So go away, dearest dissapointment, don't open the door
For if you do, you're only asking for more."

I walk where I've ran before, but now the other way
I've killed, I've cried, I've lied, I've died, for this day
The door is unlocked, I walk in
No sooner do I breathe, the memories begin
Like the tears I've cried before, I'm drowning all over again
I can feel it all tenfold from before, the hurt and the pain
I shouted and I screamed
Begging it to be a dream
And no sooner did I breathe, as it began
It ended in a splitting second, and I don't understand
But it over and I'm not done
Number of people to kill, one
Dear father, where have you gone?
Come out please, I've waited too long
Are you in your room, under your bed?
Wishing for all the things you should've said?
Too late now, I'm coming fast
Your life, will now come to pass

I come to your door, I can't take it anymore
But there's a note, with words writtin aloud
Upon reading it all, my mind has become a crowd
It can't be true, not you, not you!
You're not dead, it's all in my head!
Please, let this be a dream
Please, please I scream!

I turn the handle, and look into the dark
Upon flicking the switch, I see your body stark
Lifelessly hanging, on a rope tied to a noose
My mind is blank, but my thoughts run loose
I can't move, but I'm running down the stairs
I can't talk, yet I scream how it's unfair
I can't, I can't, yet I can
This is all too much, I don't understand
How could he take this away from me?
I've lost my face, my eyes, can't see
No tongue, no mouth, no talk, but I walk
To where I can't see, to where I can be
A person of pride, a person subside
But life, come strife, end knife
And I'm on the edge, I begin to fall
The ground comes near, to end it all

Come end, come pain
Come friend, come stain
Spill far, spill wide
Spill our - spilled lies
Death, end of breath
Lies, last goodbyes
I fall, to cry
I stall, you die
My band, makes not a sound
As my body, meets the ground

Part 4:A Cloudless Childs Watcher

I died for life
I died by knife
For a child of cloudless perportions
A death to cause, two minds distortion
I watched him grow up
I watched him grow away
I watched them both, everyday

With eyes counted two
I seen both of you
Fight to lose
Loss by twos
While I cried a thunderstorm
Your hearts no longer warm

I watched him kill his soul
Self-infliction of letting go
Of my hand, when they announced a section c
And said warmth, that he loved me
Before I was put under the knife
That would take away three lives
Over the years, under the tears
With mistaken accusations
We all died that day

I seen him turn away from the rising son
I seen him confused, I seen him run
From responsibility and reason
Towards a noose and notted treason
I watched him abuse his child away
I watched him shed a thousand tears that day
I watched him writhe in pain
I watched them both the same
I seen him with stricken eyes
I seen him jump, and say goodbye
With the taste of guilt on his tongue tip
With a single tear, that made his last trip

I watched my child, that summer day
Pick up that bird, without a word
Shed a tear, and twisted its life away
I watched him with silent screams
Kills those animals, spilled his nightmares from dreams
I seen him look with confused eyes
Question why his father despised his futile tries
To impress
A second guess
And he fell short of sane
When understanding took a name
And the mirror sported a face
With no heart, with no race
And that was the start, of his quickened pace
To a world where everyone is stock full of blood
But lacked a face

I watched his heart burn in flames
I watched his mind take the blame
And turn it to a fantasy
Where everything was exstasy
And the end of his father
Would bring him to me

I watched his thoughts form a bloody mold
I watched him listen to the words untold
That seeped through denials mirror
To cover the stains and all the fears
Left in the wake of death
The beginning, and end of breath

I watched him return, to his stricken home
I watched him walk, but not alone
I seen the desperation of his plea
I seen what he couldn't see
I watched as he read the lettered paper
I watched as the last string wavered
And broke, letting him run wild without reason
Talking with no preceeding thoughts or seasons
Walking to run where no one could ever reach
All for the cause he now couldn't breach
I seen him jump, a jump to match his father
But with no rope to catch, for he couldn't be bothered
I watched him fall, I watched them all
I cried my tears, my rational fears
I watched him die, I watched me cry
I watched, I seen, I saw
I cried, I screamed, in awe

I died for life, I died by knife
I died for death, three ends of breath
By fault of none, I've lost my husband, and son


Publication Date: 01-07-2010

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